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Joe: To start off, how'd you guys first get into music?

Shreddy: It was just always around me when I was growing up.  My parents introduced me to all different kinds of music at a very early age. Like pre-birth. Then guitar just seemed coolest to me when it was time to learn an instrument. I thank Slash for that.

Boy Johnny: My dad is a drummer, and my mom is a pianist. They made me do it.  It was very convenient that I ended up loving to do it. I started on the piano when I was learning how to walk, then the drums in elementary school.  Then I picked up guitar when I saw Wayne’s World in 5th grade.

Joe: Other than Slash and Wayne’s World of course, were there any other musical inspirations along the way?

Shreddy: Definitely.....My guitar teachers...there were two in particular who really encouraged, inspired, and sometimes touched me...... wait.... never mind.

Boy Johnny: I had this guitar/piano teacher who I swear was a lesbian. She had the most ridiculous fe-mullet, and she always smelled really good. I was really confused when I found out from another teacher years later that Stairway to Heaven wasn't an Indigo Girls song.

Joe: So how long have you two known each other?

Boy Johnny: I think it's been about 5 years.  We met at a gay club.  However, neither of us were gay at the time........ I mean AT ALL.  I'm not gay. Seriously.

Joe: So what brought you two "straight" fellas into a gay club?

Shreddy: I was just there to break some hearts and get some free drinks.

Boy Johnny: I was competing in a Freddie Mercury look-alike contest, which I lost.  I couldn't grow the mustache, so I drew one on.  I think it cost me the win.

Joe: Do things get musically competitive between you two?

Boy Johnny: We've discovered new ways to deal with our competitive nature on stage. Sometimes Shreddy will be taking a solo, and I will whisper in his ear as he's playing, and I say: dude, I hate you. I think sometimes it messes him up.

Shreddy: Sometimes I’ll "conveniently" spill my beer in the "Boy Johnny dance zone" just to see what happens. It’s all in good fun though.

Joe: Sabotage aside, what's the biggest onstage mishap you guys have ever faced?

Shreddy: Well...me and John don’t actually make mistakes.....That’s a question you'll have to ask the rest of the guys.

Joe: As far as the other guys go, do you have any pearls?

Boy Johnny: One time Kenny Bob shit his pants, but that's about all that comes to mind.

Joe: I hope this won't get you guys in trouble with KB.

Shreddy: What’s done is done my friend.

Joe: So how did you guys hook up with Trainwreck?

Shreddy: We met Klip and Daryll in Columbus, Ohio when they came through town to play. Knowing that they couldn’t do it alone, they had to call upon the help of the best Columbus had to offer… US.

Boy Johnny: I was working at a restaurant called "Max & Erma's".  I quit to go see Trainwreck play in Cleveland.  I think they liked my unfounded level of commitment so early on, so I was asked to join after original bassist, Chester Schlemanski fell ill to a rare strain of polio.

Joe: What were your first thoughts when you were asked to join the band?

Boy Johnny: Trainwreck wasn't a party we were invited to, we just showed up. Luckily we came with a keg…

Shreddy: and strippers

Joe: What’s it like being the “youngins” in the band?

Boy Johnny: It's a double edged sword, Darryl gives me noogies all the time, but Lance gives me zerberts every now and again.  So it all works out in the end.

Joe: Please excuse my illiteracy, but what exactly is a “zerbert”?

Boy Johnny: Dude, you don't know what a zerbert is???

Joe: nope, can't say I do.

Boy Johnny: It's where you make a farting sound on someone with your mouth (particularly on their stomach).

Shreddy: It’s a very erotic move Joe.

Joe: Ohhhh… here in the corn fields of Illinois we call that a raspberry.  I'm not sure why though.

Boy Johnny: I guess that works too, but would you please say zerbert from now on?

Joe: I'll do my best.

Boy Johnny: Thanks.

Joe: Now coming from Columbus, what was it like moving to LA?

Shreddy: Amazing, I didn't get behind the wheel once.  Boy Johnny drove for 36 hours straight.

Boy Johnny: I drank 432 Pepsi’s.  I think that's some sort of record in itself.

Shreddy: I can vouch.

Boy Johnny: The crazy thing is that they were caffeine free, but I didn't find that out until I was cleaning out my car a week later.

Shreddy: I guess I was too drunk to notice.

Joe: So have you spotted any interesting celebrities since you got out there?

Boy Johnny: The first star we saw when we got here was Richard Karn [the guy who played Al Borland on Home Improvement]. I lost my cool, and ended up breaking his leg.  That's a crazy story though; I don't want to tell it.

Shreddy: The whole thing is a blur to me

Joe: A lot of people bitch about not liking living in Los Angeles, how do you guys feel about it?

Shreddy: Well, being a man of excess, I thoroughly enjoy the physically enhanced people, and the abundance of places to satisfy vices... whatever they may be.

Boy Johnny: I love the traffic and stinky bums

Joe: Do you guys ever get homesick at all?

Boy Johnny: No, Shreddy and I are making a strong effort to just transplant everything we liked in Ohio to LA.

Joe: Is that a lot?

Shreddy: Yeah, like house parties, waffle houses, good corn, vast flat fields suitable for farming, you know, that kind of thing.

Both: and Phil.

Joe: Phil?

Boy Johnny: 'nuff said.

Joe: So Shreddy, was it intimidating being asked to play guitar alongside Klip?

Shreddy: Klip's a great guitarist, but intimidation didn’t really come into the picture. If anything I was just a little shy at first.

Joe: Between you and Klip, who's the better guitarist?

Shreddy: That would be a tough one to answer, because the amount of skill we both have is immeasurable. A conclusion is infeasible.

Joe: Well handled

Joe: Now Boy Johnny, you have some super vocal pipes that can strike some pretty high-end notes, is there some church choir experience in your background?

Boy Johnny: I was actually an opera major at Bowling Green State University for a short time, a strange time in my life.

Joe: Seriously?

Boy Johnny: No kidding, I parted my hair down the middle and wore a cumber bun… I really knew how to party

Joe: Trainwreck went through some rough times pretty recently; can you guys shed some light on that?

Boy Johnny: We had to sign something saying we wouldn't talk about the events of the past month.

Joe: I understand you guys went through some band therapy, did that work in patching things up?

Shreddy: Therapy is a wonderful thing. I will say that it is the reason we continue to exist.

Boy Johnny: And I discovered I’m a chronic bed wetter.

Shreddy: We all had breakthroughs.

Joe: You've got a 4 week, 21 city tour coming up in September, all in the Wreck-e-bago… any predictions or premonitions?

Shreddy: Well, it seems like there is a new found camaraderie in the group that should make for great shows and good times........or we could implode like a neutron star.

Boy Johnny: I predict a lot of driving in my future.

Joe: What do you do to pass the time behind the wheel?

Boy Johnny: I like to listen to music that the rest of the band thinks is gay, so I use my drive time as an excuse to do that.

Joe: Do you have a particular favorite for that?

Boy Johnny: Michelle Branch… that drives them crazy.

Joe: So overall, what's life on the road like for you guys?

Shreddy: At this point it’s such a formula. We're self-sufficient, so there's nobody else but the core group just traveling around. Boy Johnny or Darryl drive the RV.  I sit on my lazy ass playing video games with Lance and Dallas, and Klip flies if the drive is more than 25 minutes.

Boy Johnny: It's endless fun when we're on the road, I’m always sad when we have to come home.

Shreddy: I'll second that

Joe: Do you guys have any specific games you play to pass the time in the RV?

Shreddy: Well, on the last tour it was Tiger Woods on Game Cube. The one where you can make the golfer look like you. So much fun. I predict that will be the fave again on this tour.

Boy Johnny: One other game that I really like is when Klip gets bored at the end of a trip and decides to just rank everyone in the band in regards to most funny, best looking, smartest, etc.

Joe: So where do you guys usually rate in those categories?

Shreddy: That all depends on how much Klip's ego needs boosted.

Joe: On an average day?

Boy Johnny: Klip, Lance, and Darryl are interchangeable in the top 3, the rest seem completely random

Shreddy: - Yeah...It's not the fairest of games. Some days I feel like I would be tied with a bottled water for last in Klip's list.

Shreddy: But on a good day maybe I’ll climb to 4th.

Boy Johnny: One time I was in first place, and I was excited until I found out it was a list for "most gay"

Boy Johnny: but still, a win is a win

Shreddy: Take what you can get

Joe: Now is a Trainwreck tour consistent with the image of rock party life on the road... any funny stories?

Shreddy: I've tried numerous times to get everybody to throw a TV out of a hotel room window with me, but I guess we're just not that band.

Boy Johnny: My favorite after party was in Portland, OR.  Kenny Bob shit his pants.

Joe: Are you serious about that?

Boy Johnny: Just kidding, he actually invited a whole bunch of SUPER hot girls back to the hotel.

Shreddy: The structural integrity of the bed was at stake.

Joe: Ahhhhhhh, that story is definitely a little more romantic.

Shreddy: What are you talking about?

Boy Johnny: Some people are into that kind of thing.  Let's not discriminate here

Joe: I'm sorry, to all the fecal-feliacs out there, I apologize sincerely.

Boy Johnny: Apology accepted

Boy Johnny: oops.

Joe: Now this years tour is gonna rap up at the Moe Down Festival in New York... that's pretty huge right?

Shreddy: Its gonna start there actually

Joe: oh.

Shreddy: Damn joe.....what the hell are we paying you for anyway

Joe: So your starting out on the East Coast and then movin back west?

Shreddy: yeah.....pretty much....Its midwest, east, and south. I'm really looking forward to it.

Joe: Do you know what the attendance is like at Moe Down... someone was tellin me that festival is huge.

Boy Johnny: Hopefully... but dude we gotta run though.  I'm stripping at this gay club tonight, and Shreddy promised he would fluff me before I went on....

Shreddy: A promise is a promise Joe, and I'm a man of my word.

Boy Johnny: I'm not gay though, the money is outstanding

Shreddy: Gay for pay doesnt always mean gay.
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